Yesterday I went in the bathroom on the fourth floor of the library, which houses the Asian material. Naturally, the bathroom is occupied by five or six Asian students sprawled out on the couches, eating their lunches, talking on their phones, or doing their makeup. I walk in with my bladder filled to the brim, and knowing I would be peeing for a lengthy amount of time, I was rather perturbed. No one wants others to have the tools and information necessary to gauge the size and weight of your internal organs. But alas, when one has to go, there is little choice. So I go in and self-consciously hover over the toilet, keenly aware of every drop that hits the toilet water. The only comfort I am able to muster up is that even though I may not speak their common language, we still allllll pee. I was reassured, at least for a moment.
Now, I only went pee. While I would never go #2 in a public restroom unless nature forced it upon me with unmerciful vengeance, some feel much more open about dropping off their kids at the swimming pool in such frequently visited places. And that's okay. Each to her own. But I'm not concerned about the doers. I'm concerned about the second hand stench and its effects on obviously uneducated victims. I'm quite convinced that it is not unlike second hand smoke. I can only imagine the fumes that one gets from her own bodily excrement when it exits the body. Are these people not aware of the risks? Should BYU not make it more of a public health concern on campus? I hate to be the bad guy here, but someone eventually had to pipe in and tell America that smoking is not healthy. And while I cannot stop pooping all together (no matter how much I would like to), the least I can do is warn others of its devastating effects.
Now let's keep in mind that this is not merely an Asian phenomenon on the fourth floor of the library. Sleeping and lounging about in the bathrooms unfortunately occurs in all areas of campus. Take the Clyde Building for example. Just the other day I went to use the bathroom there, did my business thinking no one else was joining me, when suddenly I heard a cough and noticed feet hanging off the end of a sofa tucked behind a wall by the sinks. The DANGERS people! Ignorance is BLIND!
But not only is it dangerous to sleep in the bacteria infested, toxic smelling, poopy toilet spray covered tiled bathroom, it's just downright disgusting -- and quite possibly could be evidence of mild brain damage (results from the latest study are still pending). Who in their right mind would CHOOSE to sleep in there? Sleep in the hallway by the trashcan! Sleep under the stairwell where the dust moths can eat at your clothes! Sleep at a table where thousands of people have farted and drooled! But for heavens sake, do not CHOOSE to sleep in an oversized outhouse!!! Apparently, however, despite the fact that many of these people are probably acing many of their college-level classes, they are unable to make such an intelligent use of their moral agency. That is why Big Brother must step in, and for their own sake, make it for them.
Dear BYU:
Please take the couches out of the bathrooms. They are a health hazard to all.
Sincerely,
Jessica
If we wash our hands with the sanitizer dispensers at every corner, let us not be content to allow bacterial spray to plaster our faces and enter our bodies as we sleep in the moist warm air of the restrooms. It's a little harder to wash with soap.
Please join with me in supporting this newly founded campaign:
Yes to Pee, No to Zzzzz!
(Donations can be made to Account #25468)
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